“I think that the Lindbergh Baby is certainly behind this, he’s not a normal baby, okay!”
President Donald Trump sat down for a candid interview with Jeffie Pop of The Butterfly Report and admitted he believes the Lindbergh Baby’s Ghost is behind recent Russian problems and other shenanigans threatening his Presidency, including wiretapping Trump Tower .
In recent weeks strange occurrences have plagued the White House and the country is still reeling from Trump’s accusations that the Lindbergh Baby is out to destroy his legacy.
“I think the Lindbergh Baby is behind it for sure,” Trump said. “The Lindbergh Baby’s constant undermining tactics are so immature, he needs to grow up!” The President added that he also thought it was possible that the Lindbergh Baby even wiretapped his phone with the help of former President Barack Obama.
Trump’s interview can be seen in full at The Butterfly Report Morbid Monday segment.
Q: Sir, do you have any concrete evidence that the Lindbergh Baby is behind this?
A: Of course I don’t…the baby is a ghost, okay? And he’s not even made out of concrete! He looks like feathers or cotton candy or something! What do you want me to say? That he sat down for coffee with me this morning and told me he’s haunting my Presidency? Get real folks…it doesn’t work that way, okay!
Q: Do you think that the Lindbergh Baby was involved with Putin or his people?
A: How the hell would I know, dummy! As far as I heard no one from my Cabinet has ever spoken to Russia or Putin, not even the Lindbergh Baby. He’s a baby, he can’t speak Russian!
Q: Why do you think that the Lindbergh Baby would want to hurt your credibilty?
A: How do I know, he’s a baby, okay? And…not a very nice baby. Listen, I like babies, but this is no ordinary fucking baby. He is motivated by…jealousy? I don’t know, how would I know!
Q: Do you think that he will try to have you impeached?
A: Very possibly, quite possibly. That baby is not playing with a full deck! Look what he did to Amelia Earhart…crashed her plane, okay. I don’t know what he’s capable of, but I do know he’s behind the leaks…him and Obama.
Q: Did he have anything to do with ex- Attorney General Jeff Sessions and the treason charges being brought against him?
A: Possibly, quite possibly, I don’t know. But it’s quite possible this very stupid ghost infant possessed Jeff Sessions in order to cause chaos…Flynn, too! He may have possessed them both! Hell, he may possessing Sheryl Crow or Gandhi, okay. Or Frederick Douglass!
Q: Are you worried about your future, Sir?
A: Of course I am, we all should be. I can’t control what a demonic ghost baby is doing…I can’t even control what I am doing…and I think it’s because of this vicious brat, okay.
Q: Mr. President, how does a ghost baby wiretap a phone?
A: He uses pliers, okay? How should I know…why don’t you ask him?
Q: Are you worried about the Lindbergh Baby and nukes?
A: Yes I am…we all should be. He has the nuclear codes, he has access to my Twitter account, he has everything. I just feel it’s a matter of time until he uses nukes. And when he does, it’s not going to be pretty folks, not going to fucking be pretty. That freaky Lindbergh Baby is a little shit, ghost or not!